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Most of late-night TV, comprised mostly of humorous men, have been conspicuously silent on the Harvey Weinstein scandal. But on Wednesday, Samantha Bee dedicated many of her show to the story that pennyless Hollywood. The “Full Frontal” horde went after Weinstein’s response to the reports that he’d sexually tormented women the better partial of two decades.
“When the liaison broke, Weinstein done an apology-like matter in The New York Post, saying, ‘I have got to change, I’ve got to grow, we know a lot of people would like me to go into a facility.’ Oh my God, I’m so behind in the slang. Is a trickery what people call hell?” Bee quipped in her monologue.
“Oh, give me a break, White Cosby,” she added. “Nobody asked for your ‘all about mea culpa.’ Don’t censure the ’60s and ’70s for your shitty decision making. It’s sequence passionate harassment, not a Monkees tattoo.”
Bee after took aim at all men, charity virtuoso recommendation for anyone looking to equivocate Weinstein’s stream situation. Because of the flourishing list of passionate harassers, Bee expelled “Penis PSA” to let men know the dos and don’ts involving their penis:
So we have some business advice. Fellas, I’m a big comedy star condense Hollywood executive, and I’ve found that it’s utterly easy not to masturbate in front of my employees. In fact, it’s one of the easiest things we don’t do. Every day, we arise up, get dressed, take the transport to work, and then don’t masturbate in front of anyone. Next time you get the titillate to masturbate, just ask yourself, “Am we in front of an employee or a colleague?” And if the answer is yes, don’t. Just don’t.
And also, while we have you here: Men, I’m contemptible to mangle this to you, but your dick is ugly. No one wants to see your dick in any context. Even the straightest, horniest lady who loves you the many is anticipating you can get it inside her but her having to demeanour at it. So really don’t show it to strangers. Don’t content pictures of it to people, and don’t whip it out at film festivals. Your dick is objectively the misfortune thing about you. If you wish to send a lady a picture of something, try your nipple, or a pinkie toe, or a favorite mole!
Don’t masturbate in front of people who haven’t privately asked you to. And even then, stop and ask yourself, “What is the energy dynamic? Is there a possibility in ruin that this person competence only be similar to see my appalling dick out of fear for their career?” If so, make a good business choice and keep your business in your pants. Good talk, guys!
Taylor Link is an partner editor at Salon. You can find him on Twitter at @taylorlink_.